I hope you’re having a wonderful holiday season. I also know that some of us are missing loved ones. We may be struggling with grief, overwhelm, or loneliness. Here’s a simple holiday self-care tip. When your life becomes too much, step outside and breathe. The natural world holds space for us and our grief better than any human ever can.

My clients seldom reach out to me because they feel sad. They reach out because they don’t feel like themselves. They fear they’re suffering from mental illness or cognitive decline. They aren’t. Grief is just weird.

Major life transitions, such as the death of a loved one, always change us. They force us to learn in preparation for our next level of life. Bereavement research confirms that the vast majority of us can and do recover. And, we now know a lot about how resilient healers resolve their grief. Sorrow is not your destiny. Transformation is.

My father’s passing late last year has caused me to reflect deeply on my own death. I’ve been writing a series about death anxiety, to share my process for leaning into my fear. In this piece, I share how I work through my greatest source of anxiety: fear of dying alone. In this piece, I talk about building my faith in the compassion of my fellow humans and how it will draw them around me when my time comes.

How do resilient grievers get through bereavement? They believe in their own ability to find their way forward, and do what it takes to heal their own sorrow. And research shows, most of us have what it takes.